Monthly Archives: June 2005

Saturday morning found us way up in Anoka, crawling around on our hands and knees picking this year’s batch of strawberries at the Bauer Berry Farm. We picked two huge boxes – approximately 1.5 more than we needed – but it was so beautiful out I could have kept picking for hours. And by ‘for hours’ I really mean ‘maybe another 15 minutes longer than we stayed’.
That night found me standing in my underpants in our kitchen with fans blowing in every direction as I stirred pot after pot of red-hot liquid jam-magma. It was like a strawberry blast furnace or something. At one point I was so hot that I was convinced my sweat glands had stopped working properly so I tried panting the heat off like a dog. It didn’t work – I just kinda hyperventilated and got dizzy. Oh well.
Only 12 more months ’til we do it all again. Yip yip.

• I need someone to explain to me why both the Indianapolis 500 and the US Open Golf Tournament were *not* broadcast in HDTV. Aren’t they both ‘major’ sporting events? Weren’t they both being shown on ‘major’ television networks? Well then what’s the ‘major’ problem? It’s not like the networks don’t have a bunch of fancy HD cameras, they use them all the time for crappy sitcoms and/or worthless shows like ER. But screw the networks, what I really need an explanation for is why the doofs who ran out and dropped 5-large on a monster screen plasma TV haven’t taken to the streets with torches and pitchforks over stuff like this. They should at least be mounting an angry but ineffective email campaign. I bet Best Buy would be happy to sponsor the uprising. Best corporate sponsored anti-corporation rally evar.
• I need someone to explain to me what the deal is with people driving around town with giant tropical birds perched on their shoulders. Seriously, I’ve seen this *twice* in the last week and both times I thought “ha! look at that doof driving around with a bird on his shoulder”. Then the second time I also thought “wait a sec, I saw that last week, too. wtf is going on?!” Are huge tropical birds the hot new driving accessory for 2k5? If so, I totally missed the memo.
• I need someone to explain to me what the problem is over at the State Capital. A government shutdown? For real? Look, it was sorta cool when President Bartlet did it, but somehow when it’s a) real and b) Minnesota, it becomes much less ‘cool’ and much more ‘insane’. And what’s this nonsense about how if/when the shutdown does happen, the ramp meters keep running but the campgrounds don’t? We still have ramp meters?