doodledee

To help balance its bloated budget, the mayor of New York has been talking about selling off the naming rights to certain 'things' in the city. Stuff like getting Alpo to sponsor one of the dog parks in the city or something.

At first I thought it was silly, but now I'm not so sure.

While this type of corporate sponsorship probably wouldn't fly in Minnesota, why not help balance our Federal budget by selling the naming rights to the Department of Homeland Security terror threat level.

I propose:

• The Scope Green Condition. (When it's 'low' it's a 'condition', not an 'alert'.)
• The IBM Blue Condition
• The Juicy Fruit Yellow Condition
• The Tropicana Pure Premium Orange Alert
• The Coca-Cola Red Alert

Think of the money we'd make. We would all live in solid gold houses.

If they get this through congress, I promise I'll look the other way when Bush's tax cuts go through.

Oh wait, I mean I'll look the other way when The Fiskars Scissors Tax Reduction Package goes through.