doodledee

Here are my 12th annual Best and Worst of the Year Awards for 2003. As always, they are limited in scope by what I could think of when I wrote this out.

Movie of the Year - I didn't see Two Towers until this year, so that would probably be my winner. If that doesn't count - because it came out in 2002 - then I'd maybe have to say Maxtrix Reloaded or whatever the second one was called. I'm guessing I probably also would have liked Lost in Translation, but I didn't see it, so I guess it can't win.

Guilty Pleasure of the Year - Justin Timberlake's Justified album. Except for the third of the album that totally sucks, that thing just ruled. Fat fun and funky. I knew I was in too deep when I got pissed that 'Seniorita' got released as a single. That was *my* song!

Phrase of the Year (Cockney Accent) - "Bloody Good Show". When you're pregnant and you take pregnancy classes about being pregnant and having babies, you're repeatedly exposed to the term 'bloody show'. If you're my wife, you're repeatedly exposed to the cockney phrase 'Bluh-ee Good Show!' Jesus. I even annoyed myself by the end.

Phrase of the Year (American Accent) - "You just wait" and "Oh, you'll see" [tie]. By the time the kid finally got here, I was prepared for the absolute worst: sleepless nights, never leaving the house, generally kissing my old life goodbye. Breathless hyperbole, all of it.

Lowpoint of the Year - Licking gravy off the television remote control after I dropped it on my plate while eating dinner in front of the TV. In my defense, it was really good gravy, but still, it's pretty sad.

Drink of the Year - Stella Artois. It's Belgian and I've only been able to find it in sixers, but it's good.

Dork of the Year - Anyone who participated in a 'flash mob'. Simple as that.

Concert of the Year - I'll go with Phish 7/19 at Alpine. Great music, great weather, and a prego wife dancing like a maniac. How fun is that? Runner up would probably be Wilco 6/13 at the Sculpture Garden.

Annoyance of the Year - Apostrophe misuse. Now I'm no grammar nazi, but this year it seems like apostrophe misuse got kicked up a notch bam. Usually in the case of plurality. Example: "These cookie's are hella good!" Please stop.

Program of the Year - Mozilla Firebird. Best. Browser. Ever. Quit being a Microsoft tool and install it. Then say hello to tabbed browsing and goodbye to pop-up ads. Me likey.

3M Product of the Year - Duct tape. I sealed my house with plastic and duct tape as soon as the government told us to do so. It was a real pleasure to work with.

Steering Technique of the Year - The controlled slip. Sure, it's arguably less safe, but in our world of Orange Alerts, I say live a little and let the wheel slide.

Uhh, ok, that's probably enough.

Here's to 2004. I'm ready to continue kicking ass day in and day out except for the occasional day off.