doodledee

The other day I came home from work and found a rolled-up note rubberbanded to the handle of the porch door. I figured it was just another ad for tree trimming or lawn mowing or gutter cleaning or what have you, but when I unrolled it I saw that it was actually a bit of neighborhood news. Flash! The Morningside Neighborhood Association had issued a call to arms over some [apparently] unpalatable redevelopment plans for the 44th and France commercial area. Flash! Could there be real activism bubbling in the hood? Wee! Flash!

According to the propaganda sheet, the redevelopment would involve tearing down a bunch of buildings and removing 9 private homes through eminent domain. Ouch. In their place, a bunch of new retail/office type stuff would be built along with some new surface parking and a - brace yourself - 'mutlifamily' housing unit. Uh oh.

The letter urged us all to head down to City Hall and voice our opinions about the plan at the next City Council meeting. I talked with some of the neighbors and nobody seemed to know the whole story, so I penciled in the date on my calendar and planned for an early dinner.

Well the meeting was tonight. And before I get into the details, let me start by saying that our new City Hall rocks. Big ass plasma screen TVs, comfy chairs, great parking, the whole bit. I seriously want to get arrested just to see how nice the jail is. I bet each cell has digital cable. And a french press coffee maker. And super high thread count sheets.

But I digress.

The place was packed. The mayor said it was a record attendance for a council meeting and I'd be inclined to believe him. Standing room only and overflow in the lobby. It was no secret why we were all there, so after some administrivia, the agenda was reworked and we jumped right to the Public Bitchfest. Before he let anyone speak, however, the mayor said a few things to baseline the discussion. He started by saying that just because the city has this plan on the books doesn't mean that any developer is looking to implement it. In reality, the plan has been around for 15 years and nobody has ever expressed any large-scale interest at all. "Huh," I think. And even if a developer did want to do something, it's not like they could just walk in and fill out a form and start knocking shit down that afternoon. There would be *tons* of public involvment in something like that. "Uhh," I think.

Then he says that in the last 25 years the city of Edina has only taken one house by eminent domain / condemnation and it was because the homeowner asked them to for some crazy tax purposes. Furthermore, the city has no plans to take any more houses ever. "Huh again," I think. Then he says a couple more things that seem super reasonable and responsible and that's when I kind of go, "Why the hell am I here? Where's the threat to the community again? Is that a wolf I hear crying?"

But whatever, I sat there for 90 or so minutes and listened to people rage about how dumb it'd be to tear down a bunch of nice old houses to build an "office building" even though a) nobody was suggesting anything of the sort and b) it was obvious that everyone on the council agreed with what was being said. But hey, people had prepared some pretty nice little speeches and they were gonna give them regardless of the situation. Yawn.

The meeting wasn't without highlights, though. My favorite part was when my commie neighbor Mike got up and went off about how he doesn't want them to tear down a bunch of houses to make way for a Starbucks and a Big Bowl. I almost stood up and clapped, but I didn't want to encourage anyone else to talk. After the meeting, he was like a rock star. Huge crowds trying to shake his hand and tell him he rules. I just winked at him on my way out, comfortable in my knowledge that I knew him before he was famous.

I could go on a lot longer but I think that's probably enough. It was good to see everyone so organized and all, but I hate the fact that it was for a fake cause. I'll just leave it at that.